I don’t mean to sound too much like Jerry Seinfeld, but what’s the deal with mattress pads?! We’ve been sleeping on the worst mattress ever for… um 10 years. What’s so bad about it, you ask? We hacked it from a condo my mom sold and the new owners didn’t want it so obviously the poor college students would take it. At 20, I didn’t think twice about it. But now, as an adult, I’m pretty sure this is in the top 5 grossest things I’ve ever done.
Someone most likely died on this mattress. We have zero backstory. We just have a mattress. Well, 10 years, 4 abodes, 2 pregnancies, and a cross-country move later, we finally decided to splurge on a new mattress pad to help ease the unspoken nightmare that I’ll probably be sleeping on this mattress for the rest of my life.
We are 10 days in to our new mattress pad. It was so fluffy. It was kind of like those hotel beds that you wake up so rested, you just lay there awake in sleeping position, not wanting to move. Because moving a limb would ruin the glory that is hotel sleep. You know?
I noticed a decline around day four. Less enjoyable. Then today, as I walked across my bedroom, there was a noticeable divot in the exact outline of my body. Weird. Is there a ghost sleeping on my bed? Making some sort of imprint? Do I sleep in one position and not move even an inch thus causing the oddest impression on my previously fluffy feathered friend? Jaryd’s side doesn’t have it…
So that’s where I’m at. What’s the deal with mattress pads?! Is it me?
You guys will looove this, I’m going to throw it out there and say this most definitely can be eaten for breakfast, snack, dessert, you name it. I don’t like to pigeonhole things, you know? So let’s make some Superfood Snack Bars because you need this in your life. AND they are the fudgiest treat that will honestly knock that sweet tooth on its bootayy. Plus, those superfoods!! Oh my goodness, from hemp, to cacao, to maca, this is packed with nutrients you can google and brag to all your friends about.
In a food processor combine the pecans, cacao, maca powder, and hemp hearts. Process until combined.
Add the agave, and coconut oil.
Process until things are combined. Use a rubber spatula to scrape down the sides and process again until everything balls up.
Transfer the batter to a bread pan lined with parchment paper, using your spatula to press things evenly throughout the pan.
Sprinkle the top with additional chopped pecans and chocolate chips.
Place in the freezer for an hour, then cut into bars. Store in the fridge until ready to eat!
- 2 cups raw pecans
- 1/4 cup cacao powder powder
- 1 tablespoon maca powder
- 1/4 cup hemp hearts
- 3 tablespoons agave nectar
- 2 tablespoon coconut oil, melted
- 2 tablespoons pecans, chopped for topping
- 2 tablespoons dark chocolate chips, for topping
- In a food processor combine the pecans, cacao, maca, and hemp hearts.
- Process until combined.
- Add the agave, and coconut oil.
- Process until things start to ball up.
- Use a rubber spatula to scrape down the sides.
- Process again until everything balls up again and is combined.
- Transfer the batter to a bread pan lined with parchment paper, using your spatula to press things evenly throughout the pan.
- Sprinkle the top with additional chopped pecans and chocolate chips.
- Place in the freezer for an hour, then cut into bars. I cut them into 8 square bars.
- Store in the fridge until ready to eat!
- Serving (1 square): Calories 223; Fat 17.2g (Sat 5.6g); Protein 7.8g; Carb 15.3g (net carb 9.5g); Fiber 5.8g; Sodium 0mg